It’s easy for any single woman to fall into the ‘sad spinster’ category. While single men are seen as stylish bachelors, the idea of single women isn’t quite as flattering. The world imagines us with baggy clothes and too many cats. Many even imagine spinsters sitting at their windows, pining for their one true love. And, let’s face it; when you’re newly single, it’s all too easy to live up to these expectations. You may quite literally let yourself go in the aftermath of lost love. That’s what everyone’s expecting you to do anyway, right?
But, if you’ve been here for a while, you’ll know that this isn’t an idea of singledom we like to promote. Nor is it one you should use as a guideline right now. Instead of ‘sad spinster’, you should be aiming for the accolade of ‘single Goddess’. Doesn’t it sound much better? You can bet, too, that other people will treat you differently if you approach your singledom with this in mind. The question is, then, how do you go from one to the other?
In truth, shedding your desperate single skin shouldn’t be as tricky as you’re expecting. All you need to do is change your approach by implementing these content bachelorette behaviors into your lifestyle.
Learn to look good for yourself
This may seem obvious, but it’s astounding how many of us let ourselves go in the early days of singledom. There’s no guy around to impress anyway. Some of us even let our appearances loose until there’s another love interest on our radars. Hence the idea of spinsters in baggy clothing with their hair stuck up in scruffy buns. The fact is that you aren’t doing yourself any favors by letting your appearance slide in these ways. You certainly aren’t going to boost your self-esteem or the opinions of those around you. To overcome this, then, you need to adjust to the idea that you can look good for no one but yourself. This alone is the most essential realization you’re going to come to on your journey to sexy singledom. Buy a new outfit because you love how it falls against your body. Put makeup on because it makes YOU feel more confident. If you’re struggling, practice self love in the mirror, or go all out with something like a session with this boudoir photographer. By hanging those saucy prints in your (private) bedroom, you can remind yourself that you don’t need a man to be sexy. Then, you can head out with your head held high and the aim of pleasing no one but you. Hello, sexy.
Find something else to focus on
Now, we need to address the ‘pining out the window’ aspect of your spinster image. This may seem like tough love, but there is no point in waiting around for that man anymore. He’s gone, and the sooner you realize it, the better off you’ll be. Instead of waiting, then, you need to focus your thoughts and attention of something else. Lucky for you, singledom is the ideal time to learn new things which can improve the life you’re living. You have a lot more spare time on your hands now, after all. You may as well put it to good use. Why not sign up for an evening class which could help you to advance in your career? People will soon stop seeing you as a spinster if you gain a promotion and take the helm in the workplace. Instead, you’ll become a strong, SEXY, independent woman. Why not take this time to learn new hobbies or join social classes which extend your friendship circle. These are all things which can improve your prospects. They also detract your attention from the misery driving you towards spinsterhood.
Redesign your life plan
Along the same lines, you may also want to redefine your life plan as a single woman. When we’re in a relationship, many of us focus our goals around this. You know the standard stuff; marriage, babies, happily ever after. Those things are off your radar, at least for the time being. Still, we all need something to aim towards. If you write your future off, you’re again going to fall into the clutches of the spinster lifestyle. You’ll become the woman who wonders the woods with nowhere to go. Don’t let it happen. Instead, focus on new life goals which see you moving forward as a single woman. It may be that you set your sights on saving a deposit for a home of your own. Perhaps you keep promotion in mind and work towards it using courses like those mentioned. You may even decide to change your lifestyle altogether, by relocating or changing career. These are all things which can see you moving forward. Few of them are goals you would be able to focus on if your relationship aims were in the way. That’s what we call a single silver lining.
Make more effort to go out with friends
Lastly, most of us have an idea of single women as pretty sad and lonely people. In our minds, they sit in with their cats on Saturday evenings because they have no man to head out with. But, there’s no reason this needs to be your reality. In truth, singledom is a time when your friends really come into their own. Get this right, and you could go out more often now that you’re single than you did when you were in a relationship. This works especially well if you have single friends. Make an effort to go out for meals or drinks as much as possible. Even if you’re having a night in, invite your mates over. This social interaction is sure to leave you flourishing again in no time. And, who knows; getting out of the house could well lead to your next love. Even if it doesn’t, at least no one can level the accusation of a desperate single at you anymore.