4 Signs You’re Possibly Dating a Married Man


I love watching black dating shows. It’s interesting to see people date in a controlled environment. My current favorites are Ready to Love and Put a Ring On It. They’re both on Own and both give you the drama you’ve been looking for. The new season of Ready to Love just kicked off and they’re in Washington DC. On the first episode where we meet the cast, one of the young ladies said that she was dating a married man for six months and had no idea. This was her last relationship. This got me to thinking about other scenarios I’ve heard from women I’ve spoken to in the past. Women who had full blown relationships with married men but had no clue until the wife called or until they got pregnant and he said “You can’t keep it because I’m married.” It’s outrageous how folks really be out here living double lives.

This made me want to know more after hearing this yet again. So I went to Facebook and posed a two part question.

Ladies, have you ever been tricked by a married man? If so, how? Married men, how can women identify if a guy is married?

The women who were brave enough to admit it spoke about how these men had separate apartments from their marital homes. A couple of the wives actually knew but he failed to tell the innocent young lady envisioning a future with somebody’s husband. Others had wives who traveled for work or he traveled for work and was in town quite often. It’s really scary to think about but I wanted to give tips I’ve used to avoid this trap as well as tips married men offered. Here are 4 signs you’re possibly dating a married man.

Have you been to his house?

This is the biggest telltale sign, your access to his home. A man that can’t allow you to come to his home has something to hide. It’s not always marriage, it could be that he’s homeless. But either way, this is a red flag that needs to be addressed. Men are very slick so make sure you’re persistent with your questioning. One young lady stated that she went to his home but was never allowed into his bedroom. She wasn’t allowed because that’s where he held the marriage photos. Another young lady said he would make up an excuse about his place being remodeled so she asked for his address to send a gift. When she sent it, he said it went to the neighbor’s house by mistake. This was a lie, she was given the wrong address on purpose. So ladies if you’re unsure, try this. Ask for his address so you can send him something and see what happens.

Can you call him at anytime or is it set times?

This was another big red flag a lot of women who ended up entangled with a married man. They could only contact him at a certain time. Any other time they tried, he wouldn’t answer. He’d just call back at the set time. He claimed he was busy with work but he was actually busy with his wife and kids.

When you FaceTime, is it always in the car

This is one I’ve picked up on personally. The only time one guy in particular FaceTime’d me was in the car. He never called me in his home. It was always on vacation or in his car. He claimed he and his wife were separated and headed towards divorce but I wasn’t buying that. Better safe than sorry. Pay attention to his background when he is on video call. Is it always when he’s moving around or is he home?

Have you blatantly asked and what’s his response?

This sounds like common sense but you’d be surprised how many women don’t ask until it’s too late. Please make a habit of asking a man”Are you married?” and “Is anyone married to you?” No answer is an answer. Deflection is an answer. Cracking a joke is an answer. Asking you the same question is an answer. All of these are answers and they’re the wrong answer. This means he’s married, period. A man who isn’t will give you a quick no. Not a “Why would you ask me that?” Nope, the answer needs to be a concrete and concise form of no. Be sure to watch for body language because this too will tell you. I tend to ask men who my gut is telling me something is off twice. I remember asking a guy about the mother of his child and he gave me a vague answer. I then asked him the next time I saw him and he looked down at his wedding ring. He was wearing a wedding ring and forgot to remove it. Men are ridiculously bold so please ask.

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